Today my apple was the owner of the company Crapple, he was called Steve Jobsapple. His hobbies included inventing cool bits of technology, overpricing that technology and making sure there were enough problems inherent in the technology that the consumer will be forced to buy the next bit of technology.
His last words were, “I know how to make something look cool – stick a massive fucking apple on it!” which seemed crazy to me – I mean who would want to carry a product around that had a picture of an apple on it? He tasted like greed itself.

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