Archives for posts with tag: stupid

Today my apple was one of those gormless idiots who reads the paper as they walk along. His name was Dumbleburt Spoontulniff. His hobbies included getting in peoples way, walking into things and wondering why he can’t see where he is going even though he is reading a paper. His last words were, “This is worrying news about the economy. Oh dear, I seem to have fallen down a manhole.” He tasted like spud flavoured dinkleweed.

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Today my apple was a simpleton called Dopey Bob Apple. His hobbies included smoking, drinking and fart jokes. After telling him I was going to eat an apple his last words were, “Ha! Wouldn’t want to be an apple right now then!” I felt sorry for him because he was so stupid he didn’t even know he was an apple. He tasted like someone who should have tried harder in school.